B Squared Takes Big Sky

Went out on a Saturday night to a party with an actual band. Practiced a French exit. Was probably the first to leave. But hey, I actually left the house on a Saturday night in actual years.

Embraced the fact that watching cake decorating videos soothes me and followed as many Insta related accounts that I could find. You have cat videos, I have cake.

Ran into the same person twice during errands cementing the fact that Bozeman is a ridiculously small town.

Cheered “Yay, Science!” after Brian found the word ‘homology’ in The NY Times Spelling Bee game securing my Genius level status. Still don’t understand what the word means, but it worked!

Spent 4 hours between us shoveling the first two feet of snow expected this weekend. Made plans to snowshoe to the brewery later. Successfully arrived via snowshoes and treated ourselves to some pints! *Update: I fell in snowbanks twice on the way home.*

Received messages from USPS and DHL saying they were unable to deliver mail in said snowy conditions or that we weren’t home. Ironic because the USPS’s motto is to deliver in rain, sleet, or snow and DHL must have given up, as we were home shoveling out our driveway. <Insert Palm to Face Here>

Was pleasantly surprised to see that my March Madness bracket ranked in the 89th percentile. Thank you, San Diego State!

Stopped at a light behind a fancy vehicle with a ‘H8Wintr’ license plate. Found that I could relate and appreciated the sentiment. No doubt they were a new Montana resident and will undoubtedly have their car egged in the future.

Joined Brian on a scavenger hunt through a local park as we looked for the radio hyped Easter keg. The finder of the keg would win free beer for a year from our favorite brewery. We did not find it, but we’re proud to have tried.

Learned that I’m being conditioned with the promise of books each time I leave the house. As in, “If you go with me to find the Easter keg, I’ll take you to buy a book.” He later confessed that if he managed to get me out of the house, he wanted to reward the behavior. 🤣

Realized I hadn’t done a blog post in a month. Cut myself slack when I remembered that I’m 41k words into a book, traveled for nearly two weeks, and that life isn’t always super interesting when off from work.

Placed in the 98th percentile for my Oscar ballot on ESPN, a new and pleasant gaming opportunity that required constant refreshing of the app and more competitiveness than usual. Brian placed in the 83rd. He’s come so far in 11 years and no longer requires a handicap.

The Scientist came home and announced that he unexpectedly had an intern paired with him at the lab. Then was told, “Well, it was an extern, really, whatever that is.” After some googling, it is a person that shadows a role as opposed to having assigned responsibilities. The more you know.

Raced outside to get the trash to the curb as the trash truck approached. It may only happen once in a lifetime that Brian forgets and I savored my mini hero moment. MAY have intentionally used my Queen Bee coffee cup in celebration. He, no doubt, would say he didn’t want the garage door opening to wake me.

Was told that since it was date night, he’d turn up the heat in the house. Envision the massive eye roll that followed this statement.

Initially busted my bracket thanks to Arizona’s defeat to Princeton. Was informed I could soon play in the second chance bracket, a far cry from last year’s winning one. Asked more than once in the following days, “How broken can a bracket get?”

Asked how Brian slept. Was told okay. It was followed with, “but you took over the bed, so I had to sleep downstairs starting at 2.” 🤦🏼‍♀️

Celebrated St. Patrick’s Day with numerous green beers, a boozy cupcake, Ted Lasso, cheering on Montana State, and by finishing a puzzle. Maintained our annual tradition of delivering Guinness to our next door neighbors much to their delight.

Offered an, “Well, that escalated quickly,” as we went from no snow to 6 inches in an hour. Spent an hour shoveling the driveway and neighboring sidewalks or according to my Apple Watch, I “danced” since there is no ‘snow shoveling’ exercise activity option.

Made our now annual, pandemic inspired, drive to check for First of the Year Mountain Bluebirds in a nearby recreation area. Came up empty, but managed to see hundreds of white tailed deer and antelope. You win some, you lose some.

Had a visit with one of Brian’s out of state best friends. My introvert cup runnethed over when he said he preferred to stay at our home instead of journeying to a nearby brewery. Later chuckled on the inside when the conversation turned to their nostalgic researcher days. Learned the friend can still successfully tutor in chemistry whereas my Scientist probably could not.

Felt triumphant at learning that my jury duty had been excused within hours of me emailing my request. The actual summons finally arrived two days later.

It’s the slow season at The Scientist’s lab and it became obvious when he shared that his big achievement that day was mopping the floor.

Mailed out Valentines to the godchildren. Accidentally signed my last name. Fail. I may live far, but I’m pretty sure the last name only served to confuse.

Watched a new British murder mystery show and received a knowing glance from The Scientist upon mention of a Synchrotron being used to run forensic tests. While I recognized the word from numerous previous mentions, I neither know what it does, nor how to spell it.

Took a three mile walk in the winter sunshine where we both froze and sweated simultaneously. Timed it just right for the new brewery to be open for lunch. Talk about lunch with a view.

Cries of “Brittany is FREE!!!” a la Dobby the House Elf rang out as I am now officially off for the next 37 days for extended vacation.

Questioned Brian about the clunky noise emanating from the dryer. Was told it was nothing. Decided not to push. Later he discovered he had washed his AirPods.

Our SuperBowl Sunday consistented of our monthly citizen scientist bird count, a looong walk in the morning to burn off as many calories as possible to compensate for later, briefly panicking as I discovered a dead mountain lion immediately adjacent to the trail (Montana is not for sissies) and combing over our bird books in excitement when we realized that a visiting Northern Flicker looked different only to realize it was an Intergrade! (I need more bird friends to share in my excitement.)

Discovered a new fave bird cam in North Carolina. Counted 24 species of birds in an hour. Meanwhile we counted 5 types of sparrows at ours. Later in the week enjoyed a vivid sunrise on a Canadian bird cam.

Listened as Brian cheerily announced that a paper he contributed to would be the journal cover article. He deemed it, “Kinda cool when you make the cover.” Tried to articulate what I thought I remembered the project being about. Was firmly told no. The name of the journal? Toxins. <insert a Charlie Brown ‘Good grief’ here>

Spent another Monday night happily drinking beer at a brewery and selling books on behalf of the local library. Was probably one of our best customers.

Watched as they closed the main highway in the state for up to 24 hours because of poor road conditions. Found this shocking but also validating as the atrocious road conditions have been the biggest cause of my recent crabbiness. Another section of highway closed later in the week as a cattle truck went awry.

Chuckled and gaped as someone actually began ice skating in our parking lot. If that’s not a sign of icy conditions I don’t know what is.

Had no fewer than 5 packages arrival at our local post office but remain undelivered. Also undelivered? The jury duty notice for the day AFTER I leave for California. Thank you Informed Delivery for giving me the chance to avoid a bench warrant.

Was awoken 15 minutes before I had to get up thanks to Brian sitting on car keys triggering the alarm. Received Starbucks, my favorite breakfast and an apology as compensation.

Had an episode of Yellowstone ruined for me thanks to being married to a scientist who works at the Montana department of livestock and knows better than the screenwriters.

Felt immensely grateful for my hatchback style of car as in one week I hauled numerous boxes of books back to the library, 4 car seats, 4 pack n plays, and had 2 loads of crap from work that I fetched from our parking lot storage cube. Perhaps I am mistaken in my choice of car now that I think about it?

Passed a new development in town only to realize that all the street names had an alcohol theme. Names included Firewater, Blue Label, and Johnny Walker.

Happily observed motivated people getting ice climbing lessons on our favorite trail. Brian thought he “could totally do that” and I was just glad that I finished a 2 mile hike in winter in one piece.

Continued to receive Christmas cards in the mail thus setting both a new record and validating that I have my sh*t together more than I think.

Learned it was National Squirrel Day. Refused to celebrate as those buggers ruin every bird cam they visit.

Bought the newest book in my favorite mystery series from a bookstore in England as their release date is three months earlier than the one in the US. My bookish friend influenced this choice. Would love to be a fly on the wall when the store realizes the same book is going to Montana twice.

Opted to still go out for some exercise despite realizing it had began to snow in addition to it just being cold. Deciding factor? I had already put on two pairs of pants.

Tried to eat healthy by having a smoothie for lunch. Heard the blender make a bad noise. Kaput. Suggested we save the ingredients, but the idea was squashed by Brian due to the likelihood of metal blade bits. Really kaput.

Volunteered in role my as a board member at the book swap hosted by a local brewery. Overheard the two librarians that joined us debate if they were “read with book covers on or off” type of people. It’s a good life.

Spent an hour and a half shoveling the heaviest snow of my life. Was asked by the neighbor if I lost a bet.

Came downstairs after working out and washing my hair to find that Brian had completed all the tax prep for the accountant. The things one is desperate enough to do when it’s -7 out.

Planned out my nearly two week So Cal visit now that my ultra long vacation was finalized at work. Cheers to seeing godbabies, friends, family and having an ocean stay. California here I come!!

Gasped out loud as a funny gurgling sound emanated from the completely empty bathroom. Discovered the toilet had gone rogue, erupting water everywhere. Panicked and filmed it for Brian to deal with during his lunch break. Later discovered the city had been doing work on the nearby sewer lines.

Settled in to view the Golden Globes for the first time since 2021 not knowing what to expect. Embraced the awkwardness and again wondered why I bother with award shows as I can’t stand (and thus quickly mute) the acceptance speeches.

Watched the College Football Playoff game. The first half anyway as the TCU underdog status quickly became even more noticeable and thus ruined the fun. Fair weather fans, indeed.

Worked on a family fun Jeopardy inspired craft project for a loved one’s milestone birthday. Enjoyed the fact that it occurred on the same day as my networking group’s family feud based holiday party.

Requested The Scientist’s permission to add his lab partner as a Facebook friend after she was flagged as a person I may know. He looked at me weird and then consented.

Laughed as Brian moaned, “Agh, sometimes I forget how young you are!” after I told him that a classic rock tune on the radio brought back fond memories of childhood as it had appeared on my Barbie music CD.

Listened with equal parts dismay and curiosity as relatives recounted the good ‘ol days when a nice raccoon pelt would have earned you $60. Also learned that one should never eat opossum if one can help it.

Got caught in the middle of political crossfire of yelling resulting in me feeling the need to shout, “Can’t we just watch Price is Right like a normal, happy family??”

Realized I have not yet mastered the whole back to work in the office thing as I left my car door completely open all night after returning home, forgot my lunch bag, and now have to actually think about what to wear.

Celebrated a major work win by crafting myself a name plate for my desk in the new building as no one knows where anyone sits resulting in a lot wandering and asking for input from colleagues.

Watched a commercial on TV. Thought the person speaking looked like me. Realized at the same time as Brian that it WAS actually me having filmed it on behalf of a local corporate partner celebrating a milestone anniversary.

Brian’s hip popped. I asked him if he had a warranty and he happily told me no.

Was forced to apologize for Brian’s Instagram that was now full of chickens after I shared a post about how infrequent chickens kill or injure people. I was helpfully trying to reassure him after hearing for the better part of eleven years about the childhood incident involving fighting chickens. An obvious backfire on my part.

Achieved old people status by having dinner at 4:30pm multiple times this week. Party people central.

Made it to 11pm on New Year’s Eve. Was woken up promptly at midnight thanks to our neighbor’s enthusiastic use of fireworks despite the ear plugs.

Found a dollar in a parking lot on New Year’s Day eliciting cheers and hope for the coming months.

Realized that not enough life happened to warrant a blog post over the holidays (unless you count copious amounts of book reading, crap food eating, and football watching) and that it would be biweekly entry type of deal.

Counted up the number of new birds seen in 2022 and tallied a whopping 30. Was promptly told by Brian that I had “better get on it” for 2023.

Listened to The Scientist lament the new, much more intense protocols around avian flu testing he must do now that they know humans can get it. It involved the wearing of a special outfit and probably other things but I checked out as a defense mechanism.

Was offered a one thousand dollar gift card if one of us agreed to take a much later flight home since it was overbooked. Promptly replied to the airline rep that it would kill me to pick Brian up from the airport at 1am because we both knew I would not be the one left behind.

Worried that my scratchy throat was COVID. Was helpfully reminded by Brian that I’d recently worn a mask all day while traveling AND spent time in smokey AF casinos. Fingers crossed. (It wasn’t.)

Checked in on a family member that tested positive. They were remarkably chirper and enjoying copious amounts of television. Later got to wish them a Merry COVID Christmas.

Officially kicked off “Go Outside and You Die Weather” two months earlier than usual with lows in the negative thirties with a high of negative fifteen. The Scientist meanwhile worried that our soon to arrive COVID tests would freeze in the mail. P.S. The extra tests left in the truck did freeze….

Took shifts mopping up puddles of water inside the house thanks to the melting ice from the windows. You know, because it was -33 outside.

Made a note to purchase more COVID tests from Costco now that it’s doom season and I took three tests that clearly confirmed I was neurotic and had a baby cold.

Lamented another week in Fantasy Football season with a, “These f*cking a**holes are going to kill me!” as well as a, “Do I lose points if it’s a pick six?!” much to the amusement of Brian.

Told Brian to just Google it for the thousandth time this year over a Love Actually related character question much to his chagrin and my delight.

Had a jolly Christmas with plenty of booze, food, football, electric candles that glowed red and green, rain, lasagna, family phone calls and naps by 2pm.

A cold snap in Montana in December means waiting in panic to see if the cracking sound you heard when you tried the car door handle was it breaking off or just ice shifting. The handle lived. Brian’s wiper blades not so much.

Chuckled as Brian reported back that he saw our next door neighbor racing the trash truck to get his can out and did so in his socks through the fresh and plentiful snow on the driveway.

Asked Brian how his day was and received a chipper, “I only had to deal with a skunk’s head so I didn’t get smelly!” I think it means he had a good day?

Visited a pharmacy near the Strip and realized many of the basic sundries are kept locked up. Booze I get, but lotion???

Got accosted by food and entertainment hustlers trying to offer up discounted options while walking on the Strip. Was asked if I liked steak (No), was asked if I gambled (No), and did I like shows (No). Was then promptly asked why I was in Vegas then. Exactly.

Gaped at Brian when he meekly shared that the stripper dressed as an elf smacked his ass as we passed after rejecting her bid for a photo. This is why I’m not a Vegas person.

Decided all the hassle and Vegas shenanigans were worth it after seeing Adele in concert. My god, does that woman put on a show. If I get COVID, it WILL still be worth it.

Continued to do Vegas our way by birding on the UNLV campus and visiting various art exhibits. Gambled only once when Brian spotted a Conan the Barbarian themed machine. His $20 was gone by the time I finished taking his photo.

Found the mall located on the Strip and cheered. A multistory shopping center even better than what I experienced during my childhood. It had everything you could want (including a cupcake vending machine!) as long as you didn’t want a bookstore. 🤣

Visited The Neon Museum, a boneyard chock full of historic Vegas signage. Oooed and ahhed appropriately.

Continued to monitor the Florida martini bar webcam. Happily discovered that they serve breakfast, still have the velvet ropes in the morning, and that 235 other souls were also tuned in.

Had ourselves a little Montana State University date night reveling in the annual holiday tradition of lighting up Montana Hall. Blue and gold colored treats were had, managed not to fall on the icy sidewalks, and oohed and ahhed at both the campus preschool choir performance and festive lights.

Received three random automated phone calls requesting my participation in a nationwide COVID survey. Decided it was spam and cursed them like I do all my other junk calls.

Was reassured with a, “Don’t worry. I tested negative twice!” after a friend that was recently COVID positive sat next to me. Decided I just didn’t care anymore.

Continued to enjoy our elf on the shelf notes although Brian tried to deny he wrote mine prompting an eye roll and guffaw from me.

Overheard at The Eilers: Brian: You threw away the tape that had my splinter on it! I was going to take it to work and look at it under the microscope. Me: Who does that?? Brian: A scientist! Me: <insert palm to face here>

Celebrated that Friday’s mail haul brought only Christmas cards. Whoop whoop!

Paused to smell candles for sale in the hopes of finding a new holiday scented one. Couldn’t smell it due to the intense amount of packaging. Cue Brian piping in with a joke about me having COVID. Funny not funny.

Shopped at Target and had to pause when I heard Brian laughing behind me in the candy aisle. He had spotted the “packaged sugar” sign. Target calling it as it is per usual.

An almost fight broke out during our first citizen scientist Rosy Finch Project feeder watch session over whether or not we were properly counting the Black-Capped Chickadees. Was forced to compromise for the sake of science.